Where is My Ovation?

An article I read in TechRepublic today made me smile. The author talked about "praise-craving generation" in today's work force. She first described how she had to brain washed her husband, who had all the attention of his elder sisters, to stop seeking praises and gratitude at every little thing he did.

"If he performs some chore around the house (that I usually do without any fanfare), he expects me to have a tickertape parade in his honor. It's not that he thinks he's better than anyone else, it's just that the standard mode of being for him is, as I said, solidly in the center of the known universe."

Imagine her surprise when she read an article about these new breed of manpower.

I would like to give my take on this issue. What happened was, this generation grew up with parents who were somewhat brainwashed by psychologist/psychoanalyst/children experts that kids should be praised at whatever they do, even if it such a small and simple thing. When you grew up thinking that being able to brush your teeth in the morning was an accomplishment, you would expect the same every time.

Okay, that example was a bit of an exaggeration... Look at this example given by the author:

"After I read that, I had this mental image of a 20-something, who has just fixed a frozen screen by rebooting a computer, surrounded by a crowd of supervisors roaring with applause and throwing bouquets of roses at his feet."

Anyway, what I'm trying to say is that who we are today are partly the product of our upbringing. The other sculptures include the environment, peers and our own set of choices, to name a few. Some turned out better than others. Some living the lives only dreamt by others.

We are growing up every single day. And as we are, we learn new things. We also learn new ways to accomplish the same old things. But the actual growing up phase where everything that we learnt gets absorbed and remained as part of us will always be there until the day we say goodbye to the material world. And this part of us will definitely materialise once in a while no matter how matured we have become.

I can say that I am not one of this new breed. In fact, when I get praised, I actually wonder if the person has hidden agenda. Seriously. I grew up with the expectation I have to do the best and I can do the best. I never get praised although I went up the school stage every year to get awards for my academic achievements.

When I handed my SPM results to my father, he only pointed out the subjects that I could've scored better. He did not congratulate me despite my good overall grade. Harsh? Maybe. I accepted my mom's explanation, other people would be congratulating me and my father just wanted my feet to be firm on the ground.

My parents were never into parenting psychology books. They brought us up through the way they thought best. And I don't blame them. After all, I thank God they did it their way, or I might not be who I am today. Heh.

So, what do you do the next time you get a subordinate or colleague who expect you to congratulate him or her every time they managed to complete a progress report?

By the way, enjoy this too: Bosses: A Field Guide