Semalam

Sunday. Petang. Helped mak to do some garden clean-up. Mak said pokok puding kat tepi pagar tu dah berpenyakit. I went to inspect. Umm.. Yeahh.. White, shell-stuff. Gross. You know... macam teritip atas batu kat pantai tuh. Definitely a goner. Memang kene buang lah. So I asked mak, mana abah nyer gergaji dwarf tuh? It's a tiny saw with yellow handle. I've always liked using it. Long time ago. When I do gardening. Every weekend.

Mak pun pegi la korek kat dalam gobok kat tepi rumah tu. The moment it's in my hand, it felt good. Tapi, bila aku start je nak gergaji pokok puding tuh, I felt frustrated. The blade kept on getting stuck in the middle. Aku ni pemalas sikit, jangan tak tau. I just keep on menggergaji. It's a matter of technique, you see... So, dengan bersungguh-sungguh la aku tolak and tarik menatang tuh. Pokok puding tuh, obviously la bergerak-gerak kan? So, all the white stuff berterbangan. Dalam kepala aku... habis laa rambut aku. Jangan la kulat ni nanti jadi entah aper creature kat kulit kepala aku pulak.

Mak came over to see my progress. Lepas tu dia dok bebel sebab aku buat keje tak pakai gardening glove. Dia pi la keluarkan from the same gobok where she took the saw. Aku sengih jer, malas la. Besides, I feel more comfortable doing gardening bare-handed, idiotic, I know. Long time ago, I used to plant flowers and shrubs, prepared the soil. And it just give me pleasure to feel the earth between my fingers. I was just rekindling the feelings.

So, habis menggergaji, I collected all the casualties and stacked them in the drain outside the perimeter of the house. This is where we do open burning, you see... He he he... Mak already started the fire kat timbunan yang dah kering. Then I told her I carry on from there, because I wanted to burn the pudings as well. Mak cakap, basah lagi tu, biar je la dulu sampai dia kering. I said, tak per, I can do it.

Long, long ago, I learnt from my father how to burn recently cut leaves and shrubs. You see, they are still 'wet', making it difficult to burn. Three things he told me was:

• maintain small fire, if it's too big it'll die faster. the smoke is and indicator there's fire underneath.
• leave some air holes. that means do not stack the leaves, branches, ranting all together. have to be patient putting them one by one. slowly. the fire needs air.
• last but not least, at times, when there is no breeze, you need to blow some air to feed the fire. (tapi aku selalunya kipaskan ajer, being impatient that I am...)

So semalam, aku pun praktikkan lah aper yang abah ajar. And being me, sementara dok membakar tuh, I ponder on life and incidentally related it with the burning.

• in life, we need to take a step at a time. if we go up too fast, we go down quickly too. there's always place and time for everything.
• we should not complicate our lives. again, slow and steady. and we should leave some space for other things in life, besides our goals.
• at times, we need to dirty our hands and do it ourselves instead of waiting for things to happen. in fact, most of the times we need to do this. there's no short cut. because the breeze does not come often.

Aku rasa macam aku boleh tulis buku pasal life and motivation bila aku boleh relate kan life to the simple things that we do. Hahaha.. Lepas tu aku gelak sorang-sorang. Abah came down from his stint with the internet. Dia ingatkan adik bongsu aku yang dok membakar. I said I have everything under control. He smiled. Maybe dia terpikir, ada jugak benda yang anak perempuan dia belajar and can practice correctly. He he he...

I left the fire burning slowly. And I know everything will turn to ashes if it doesn't rain that night. But I made one mistake. I did not check it before leaving the house. Maybe I should call Mak now and ask her whether everything habis terbakar or not...