Another clueless crayon!

I hate feeling disappointed. More so when anger creeps in as well. And not to mention feeling humiliated and stupid. I hate feeling stupid.

Hate is such a strong word. I know. But at this moment, I'm not sure I'm capable of feeling anything else with what just happened. I especially loathe liars. Too bad I started to trust and feeling proud for the person. But I guess, no one can be trusted these days. They just end up disappointing you more.

I think I've had enough of this crap. I'm sure playing the field for fun is much safer. No emotional attachment whatsoever. And since you know where you stand from the beginning there is no heartache. But then again, how long can a person be this way? Besides, it's not healthy, isn't it? Ha ha ha.. I don't know anymore. I'm void of feelings now. Which is, a good thing, I guess.

I know I said I hate just a little while ago. But after few laughter with my soul sis, a call to my Momma, I feel better. Life is not so bad after all. And people like the person who made me feel bad about msyself and life are just not worth a dime of my time. And these people, they come and go, for reasons that I do not want to explore. Seriously wasting time. Anyway, there must be hikmah why God put them in my path, so yeah, I hear You!

Look, it's bad enough you're not being honest to me. You're not fully honest with the other person as well. So, I suggest you make up your bloody mind and be done with it. You're not a kid in high school. You're supposed to be matured enough with all that had came your way. But hey, who am I to stop you from doing what you feel like doing. Maybe it's right for you, but by God it's not fair for everyone else. I'm cool. Just, lose my number.

So, write that off already. On a brighter note. I went for a job interview yesterday. Seemed promising. No more programming. Yeay!! Oh, the lady manager asked me one question that made me laughed heartily. "I'm just curious about one thing. You seem to be very smart and intelligent. But why is your tertiary results... were you dating at that time?" Ha ha ha... Still laughing even now when I think about it.

I guess, life makes you smarter if you choose to. But the fact remains. I hate exams. I hate being asked how much I remember instead of how much I understand. Huh! Hate lagik. Not good.

So, henceforth I shall refrain from using that verb. Not good. Especially in such beautiful, peaceful month, eh? Oh... I used some vulgar words when telling off the person this morning. For that, I apologise. I'm usually controlled, but it just pierced me when people lie. :-)

Have a great weekend lovely people. God bless!

UPDATE: still feeling pis*ed. some people just leaves mark better than others. especially when the person has a little soft spot in your heart. Anyway... to quote Pink. You and Your Hand, dude.

"I'm not here for your entertainment
You don't really want to mess with me tonight
Just stop and take a second
I was fine before you walked into my life..."

Truth is, I don't forgive easily. And I don't forget. You've got nothing to lose for messing with me, just another angry female across your burnt bridges. What ticks me most is that, I care too much for the people who are close to me. I care. But the fact remains, I am insignificant in their lives. Life has got to be better than this. Friends should worth more. Gosh! Am I bitter!

Anyway, I'm meeting some old friends later. Soul sis included. Meaning I'll be seeing those cute muppets of hers! Will take pictures but, won't post it here. If you know my Friendster account, you'll find it there. Yes, I broke my cardinal rule a couple of days ago. Posting my picture on the cyberworld.