First November

The sky is blue with patches of white cloud. It's going to be a beautiful day. The temperature in the office is so so low that I'm shivering at intervals.

I miss him. His new schedule allows us few minutes to talk over the phone everyday. And I miss him. And I know he misses me too.

He would wake up early in the morning and call me just before I go to work or when I was about to start the car. And I would immediately asked him why he woke up so early. In the beginning I think he felt a little akward being asked that way when I was actually worried that he wouldn't be getting enough sleep.

Today, I'm meeting him at noon though, for an errand.

The other day I caught him looking at me with that long soulful look of his. I asked him why but he just shook his head and smiled. Later he told me that he's getting dependant on me. He said he would feel something missing off his day and realised that he talked less with me on that day. I smiled and told him that I remembered telling him almost the same thing not too long ago.

We are getting dependant on each other. Our highlights of the day means we get to see each other or talk more over the phone.

It's sickeningly lovely that I do not know whether to feel happy about it or disgusted with myself. Disgusted in a good way, I mean.So it boils to the same thing. Being in love makes your eyes crossed at times you do not expect. Having someone to share this lovely feeling makes you smile even when you're feeling mad.

Half of me is wishing that this feling will last forever. Another half of me, the jaded half of me, knows that this is the plateau of the relationship; and one day it will all settle down, worse, dwindle down to nothing.

As I'm writing this, I wonder if I should leave this post in here or should I create another anonymous blog somewhere else. But, hey, this is me. I guess it's okay if my friends know my fears and joys, my sorrows and laughter.