June 29, 2007

Be Thankful

There is a wise saying that tells us that if we have to compare, compare with the less fortunate, such you will be thankful.

A few weeks back, I was in Mak's kitchen making coffee for breakfast. The creamer was running out I had to open a new one. As I was cutting the metal top away, I stopped and a sudden realisation came to me. It was the second can that I opened that weekend. I remembered opening a fresh one just the morning before. I was a little stunned.

As I continue my coffee making routine, my grey matter started to spark sending all kinds of messages amongst each nodes. I thought about the people who would feel so lucky just to get their hands on a mug of teh tarik. What more to be able to have their coffee and tea with creamer every day.

I know it sounds extreme, but it does happen, doesn't it? I looked around Mak's kitchen and thought how blessed I am that my family has such a lovely abode. At that moment, it didn't matter that it was not a bungalow or a town house or a three-stories semi-D. At that moment it did not matter that my room was spartan, I was just thankful I have my own bathroom; there's no need to share with my brothers because their room has their own.

That second can of creamer made me think through out the making cekodok session. Seriously. I thought about how I have my own car, small it might be, but it gets me anywhere I want to. I thought about my job and the small amount I get every month, but I'm still able to rent on my own and have a life. I thought about the clothes and accessories that I own, the hundreds of Ringgit worth of perfumes. And I said to myself, I am blessed. In and out, end to end, I am blessed.

I thought about my parents, and how blessed I am that at this age I still have them both around. I can still run to Mak and have her hug me, or act foolish with Abah and get him to stare me. I can even get to miss them "lecturing" me, and just do something stupid to make sure they do! I am thoroughly blessed!

All these while, instead of thinking of these blessings and be thankful for them everyday, I always lament on the things that I do not or could not have. I complain about my salary and how I am created for bigger and greater things. I envy people living lavish lives, the lives at this moment I could only dream about. I feel sad when I cannot just replace the things that I lost.

I complain and lament and cry and complain and make noise.

Well, I guess I used to. I am doing my best to stop doing all those. Everytime I feel like complaining or lamenting, I do my best to remind myself of the less fortunate and be thankful on how blessed I am. I have realised that by looking at luckier people, even when I'm congratulating them and feel happy for them, I am hurting inside. I keep on asking God why wasn't I chosen to be one of the lucky ones? Why must I lost things or people that I love? I keep on asking "why". I realised I cannot be happy if I continue asking that.

So now, I'm living my life a day at a time. I am doing things based on what I have at the moment. I tell myself that God willing, my time will come and all my dreams will come true if they are indeed the best for me.

I believe that God has specific plans for everyone. He tests us with bad experiences, with good fortune. He is testing us whether we are happy or sad. He even tests us when He gives us knowledge. All that is here is His, we are only borrowers. It's with His grace that we are here today.

It does not matter now if I cannot buy that Honda that I dream or that condo in Damansara Perdana. There is a reason for everything. And the best thing is that, if we have to wait, we should. Because patience is its own reward. If you feel that you are not getting what you want, it's because that is the best for you. And if we continue asking "why", we can never move forward and we are stuck at thinking how unlucky we are. That's not how we should live our life, right?

So I am thankful. Really, really thankful. I am blessed. And the moment I can actually say those words dengan ikhlas I know I will be truly happy.

Our hati is something that we have to mold and guide. It is like teaching a child. Teach your hati good things, and it will be happy. Teach it to feel sad and it will cry. Teach it to be thankful and it will be comforted.

Have a good weekend everyone.

4 comments:

UglyButAdorable said...

well said gal!! bravo..

D.N.A.S said...

I pun nak beli condo kat Damansara Perdana.

The Momster said...

u r one lucky gal to me!! :)

Hajar said...

UBA: thanks.. :-) my only hope i can stick to what i said!!

dnas: iskk.. lawa kan? i pi tengok Milan ari tuh.. haih... 350K... saper nak kasi?

n|ns: ameeeeeennnnn!