Nice, nicer, nicest

Are we being nice or mean when we don't tell our friends as so not to hurt their feelings? This can range from a simple thing like, getting comot a bit while eating or that annoying trait that surfaces every now and then.

Are we being nice and complacent or just plain stupid when we kept quiet when someone hurt our feelings? This probably happen when your boss yelled at you just to let off steam or a close friend carelessly said something or a parent puts you in a difficult position.

It's fun to observe the characteristics of our culture, where we don't say anything just because we do not want to be in a combat mode. Of course there is going to be a debate of the situation when you tell the other person your point of view, which is the opposite of his/hers. So, we choose to keep quiet because, oh.. tak pa laa... buat apa nak gado gado... And this attitude made us lost an island in the south decades back.

We should choose our battle ground. And go into battle only when it is necessary. We cannot let people walk all over us just because we want to be nice, and we want to avoid confrontation. But many a case, we do not want to hurt the other person's feelings. Because we are close. The real reason is, we do not know how the other person would react if we go against their wishes. And we are scared that by opposing we will destroy whatever relationship that we have.

Now, who said anything about burning the bridges just because we think differently? Why can we debate with strangers to prove our points but we think twice before we go against our loved ones? Strange, is it not? Probably it's part of the genetic make up as well. But I refused to accept this as a reason, because it is more attitude. It is how you approach the subject and handle the situation.

Easy as it is to say, it's harder to put it into practice. Only because we've been dormant for so long. We were brought up in a culture that is easily satisfied and non-confrontational. No, it is not good to be aggressive all the time, that is why you choose your battle ground. Hey, only people with loose screws in their grey area goes to war all the time, eh. Definitely not sane.

So, let's be nice when it's appropriate, and a little mean when the situation is called for. In the end, it's for the greater good.

Psst... I personally disagree with the way some people approach the issue of the comic by Denmark. But that'll be in another post. Remember, remember, remember. Islam is a religion of peace.